Outside
by C van Zyl
Summary: Four times Logan finds Julian outside a party and one time Julian finds Logan outside a party. This is their story through five snippets of their lives crossing paths and the consequences that those few moments have on the rest of their lives together. Based on CP Coulter's 'Dalton'.


**OUTSIDE**

**DISCLAIMER:**** I do not own anything related to Glee or Dalton by CP Coulter.**

Author's Note: I'm really not sure where the inspiration for this came from but I suddenly found myself sitting in front of my laptop furiously typing away. Enjoy this end result!

* * *

**_1_**

It was just before the summer holidays in their freshman year. It was also the first time Logan had ever been drunk. Of course he'd had alcohol before and had even been tipsy on the six-pack of beer that Derek, Julian and him had stolen from Derek's bar fridge during a long weekend at the Seigerson mansion. But this was the first time Logan had ever been properly drunk. Being the infamous Stuart Trio had come with a reputation that needed to be upheld and Derek had insisted that crashing the upcoming senior Stuart boys' off-campus party was the way to ensure their bad-ass status.

"We gotta go! If we do, everyone else will know that we mean business." Derek had announced to the other two a week before the party.

Julian had been the most sceptical, "What do you mean 'we mean business'? What business?"

Logan had rolled his eyes while Derek had said exasperatedly, "Dude, come on! It's a figure of speech! Just imagine how awesome it'll be when we crash a senior boys' party!"

Julian had looked at Logan expectantly, "Well?" Julian would always follow Logan, no matter how stupid the idea.

Logan had gotten up, feigning boredom, and walked around the room, trying to raise the anticipation before turning to the two other boys with an excited grin, "We have to go, Jules. Derek's right, it'll be awesome!"

Crashing the party hadn't been very difficult and as long as they stayed away from the Stuart prefect and any of the other imposing Stuart seniors, they were safe. There was enough alcohol, music and pretty girls (and guys) to make the party a success and it wasn't long before Logan was drunk and Derek was making out with a hot girl. Julian looked around the room and sighed tiredly before stepping through the glass patio doors and making his way into the much quieter garden. The house where the party was taking place was owned by a junior Stuart boy who had offered up his mansion in an effort to appear cooler to the other Stuarts. The music was pounding out of the house but out in the large, cool garden it was a little more subdued. Julian looked up at the sky which was starry and beautiful, felt the cold breeze on his face and sighed in relief at being away from the stifling environment of the raging party inside the house. He wasn't one for big parties, not in Hollywood and not anywhere else. He walked a few more metres away from the groups of drunken teenagers, dancing and drinking by the pool and felt his head grow clearer. A rustling in the bushes startled him before two giggling drunk people staggered out from behind them and made their way back to the party. They didn't seem to notice him. He found a garden bench and sat down. It was almost three-quarters of an hour later when a drunk Logan made his way up to him and almost collapsed onto the bench beside him.

"Hey Jules!" Logan said uproariously, "Whatadya doing out here?"

Julian smiled at his best friend, "Nothing. What are you doing here?"

Logan's unfocussed eyes wandered around the garden, "Lookin' for you, 'course." He giggled randomly and leaned back on the bench.

Julian frowned, "Why were you looking for me?"

Logan shrugged his shoulders and said more quietly, "Dunno." There was a pause before he spoke again, a bit too loudly, "Derek was so right about this party!"

"Why?"

Logan finally looked at Julian with slightly confused eyes. The confusion in his eyes passed quickly and he giggled again, "'t's _awesome_!"

Julian decided a few minutes later that it was time for the Stuart Trio to go home and he pulled Derek away from a girl who looked to be about twenty, gathered Logan and took them all back to Dalton.

* * *

**_2_**

Every year, the Warblers' threw a giant party to celebrate their awesomeness and Julian's sophomore year was no exception. Because of their rock star status, the Warblers' were somehow given permission to hold the event on-campus and the teachers even turned a blind eye to the obvious alcohol and unruly behaviour, not to mention the blaring music. Although Derek and Julian weren't Warblers, Logan insisted on dragging them along every year. Derek was reluctant to go because there weren't any girls and Julian was reluctant to go because this year he knew that both Blaine and Joshua would be there and he didn't know if he could stand watching Logan fawning over the two Windsors anymore. Logan wouldn't listen to either of their complaints and stormed off in a rage when they said that they didn't want to attend.

"I don't even know why he wants us there. It's not like he's going to give us any attention when Blaine and Joshua will be there." Julian said sullenly to Derek once Logan had slammed the door. Derek gave Julian an odd look but didn't say anything. If he didn't know any better, he would have said that Julian was jealous.

Julian and Derek had ended up going to the party. Logan was happy again and that was all the justification Julian needed, even if he knew that Logan was probably more happy about seeing Blaine (and Joshua) and getting to grind up against him with the excuse of 'dancing' than because Julian and Derek were going.

Julian looked down at the time on his phone and did a quick calculation of how much time he would have to stick around for before he could leave, without appearing too rude.

He gave himself an hour. Logan was laughing and grinning down at the innocent-looking Blaine while Joshua danced with some of his Windsor friends and sent Logan seductive looks. Julian picked up another plastic cup of crappy beer and downed half of it in one go before scanning the party to see Derek in a discussion with some nameless Stuarts, probably talking about the upcoming rowing event or whatever they were called. Julian didn't care enough to wonder about it for more than a couple of seconds. He glanced down at his phone to check the time. You would have thought that Julian Larson would never have felt alone at a party, especially since his rise in Hollywood fame, but there weren't any girls to fawn over him and he gave off such an unapproachable feeling because of his anger and jealousy over the whole Logan-thing that no one was brave enough to initiate a conversation with him. He still had fifteen minutes before he would allow himself to leave but he gave his conscience the mental finger and pushed his half-filled plastic cup of beer away from him before making his way, unnoticed by either of his best friends, out of the Warblers' hall and into the cool night air. He wasn't half-way to Stuart house when Logan's voice rang out to him, "Jules!"

_Damn it! I thought he hadn't noticed me go,_ Julian thought before turning to see Logan standing on the grass, waiting for him to respond.

"I'm tired, Lo-"

"You weren't at least going to tell me or Derek that you were going?" he called, moving towards Julian.

Julian tried to remain calm and unaffected, "I didn't want to interrupt you and Blaine." He gave a grin, which he hoped made him look like he approved of their relationship.

Logan stopped in front of Julian, "And Derek?"

"How do you know I didn't tell Derek?" he smirked and shrugged his shoulders, his mask perfect on his face.

Logan ignored the question and narrowed his eyes, "Why do I always find you outside, sneaking away from parties?"

Julian hesitated, not sure of what Logan was trying to ask, or even of his mood at that moment. Normally Julian could read Logan's face and expressions like a book but right then it was somehow way more difficult. "I'm just-" he started to repeat his excuse of being tired but something in Logan's face made him stop. Maybe it was better to tell him the truth, maybe then he wouldn't have to endure more Warbler parties, "I guess I don't really like parties that much."

Logan frowned, "But you always go to parties. You're Julian Larson."

"Just because I go to them doesn't mean I like them." Julian shrugged, "You better get back to Blaine, wouldn't want him running off." He said, actually feeling tired.

Logan's face split into a grin, "Nah, I don't have to worry about him. I know he isn't going to leave me. Just like he knows I'm not going to leave him."

Logan's sickly sweet tone made Julian feel sick and angry. In the spur of the moment, he decided that if Logan was going to cause him pain, then he was bloody well going to hurt him as well as he could. "I'm leaving tomorrow morning."

His sudden announcement caused Logan's grin to falter and fade, "What? Are you serious? Why?"

Julian felt a disgusting pang of joy at Logan's bewildered shock and the fact that he had knocked Logan's stupid grin off his face. "Got a movie in L.A. Filming starts next week."

Logan turned angry now, "And you waited 'til _now_ to tell me? Were you _ever_ going to tell me?!"

Julian didn't answer and that was all that Logan needed to hear. He glared at Julian while the hurt and rage festered, "I can't believe you! Does Derek know? I bet he does! You're a seriously _shit_ best friend, you know that?!"

With those furious words, Logan turned, stormed off across the grass and headed back to the party and Blaine. Just before he entered the building, he turned again and shouted across the lawn to Julian in a spiteful tone, "I hope you have fun in Hollywood! I won't miss you at all!"

Julian stared as Logan slammed the door shut on his way into the Warblers' hall and through the many windows, Julian could see the furious Logan stride across the room, grab a bewildered Blaine and smash their mouths together. The people around them looked shocked by Logan's wild behaviour but Julian knew that somewhere in Logan's mind, he was sending a message to Julian: Julian wasn't going to be missed, Logan would be just fine without him.

* * *

**_3_**

The Prom of The Stuart Trio's junior year was a significant event. Not only was it a celebration of the fact that the danger was over and Adam was gone, but it was also a sad reminder that things would never be the same. Mr. Harvey was dead and buried, the Art Hall was burnt and blackened and Julian was back at school. That last one came as the biggest surprise to everyone, especially Julian himself. He hadn't been awake from his coma for more than two weeks before he was visited by none other than Kurt Hummel. It was awkward and awful and Julian wanted to scream and cry but at the end of it, he somehow found himself agreeing to not only come back to school, but to attend the fucking Prom.

Even though Kurt had told people of his success in managing to get Julian back to school, everyone stopped and stared as Julian walked into the Prom. The venue was beautiful and there was music and exquisite food. The only problem was that Julian hated parties. He also didn't have a partner, but he reckoned that after everything he had gone through, the lack of a partner to a Prom that he didn't want to be at was not exactly something to worry about.

"Jules!" Derek approached him with a grin so bright and big that Julian took a step back before he was pulled into a ferocious bear-hug. "I'm so glad you're here! Nice tux, man." He said as he pulled away and held Julian at arm's length so that he could get a better look at him.

Julian tried his best to smile but ended up grimacing. Seeing this, Derek immediately let go of him and muttered a "Sorry, Jules. It's just good to see you."

At this, Julian tried another smile and actually managed it that time, "It's okay."

"I didn't think you'd actually come…" Derek said softly.

Julian glanced around at the boys and their dates, "Neither did I… Kurt can be very… persuasive though."

Derek gave a quick grin but didn't say anything. The silence that followed was nothing short of awkward until Casey, Derek's date, came up and got a conversation going.

Logan, on the other hand, watched Jules and Derek silently from the other side of the hall. He was relieved to see Julian alive and well but he didn't know if he could ever speak to him again. It wasn't that he didn't want to, it was more that he didn't know what to say. Or how to say it. He didn't even know why he was at the stupid Prom anyway, he guessed it had something to do with the fact that Kurt had asked him to come and a part of him still loved Kurt so much that he had not hesitated to do as he wanted.

He didn't have a very good time, he didn't speak to anyone besides a few sullen words and some angry ones at the twins when they tried to get him to dance. He sat at an empty table, ignored the pitying glances he got from some people and watched Julian, who was the only one there that seemed to be having as miserable a time as he was.

He knew that Julian didn't like parties but it wasn't until that Prom that he finally understood why. It was really difficult to enjoy yourself when you're constantly reminded of your discomfort by other people's happiness.

Because he was watching Julian, he spotted Jules leaving out one of the doors before anyone else did. Without knowing what he was doing, he got up and followed him out into the evening air.

"Julian?" he called out to Jules when he looked around the gardens and found that he had managed to lose him.

He walked around the building until he saw a lone figure leaning against one of the trees.

"Julian." He announced his presence as he came closer to the actor. Julian lifted his head to the sound of his name and froze when he saw that it was Logan.

"What are you doing here?" Logan asked when Julian remained silent.

Julian shrugged and looked uncomfortable. Logan wondered whether he should go. He didn't even know what he was going to say, let alone where he would even begin. A silence stretched between them and Julian wondered whether he should just leave now.

Logan spoke before he had the chance to, "I heard you're coming back to Dalton."

After more silence and Logan thinking that perhaps Julian was never going to speak to him again, Jules answered quietly, "I was thinking about it."

Logan answered without thinking his response through properly, "I hope you do."

Julian's head turned suddenly and their eyes met for the first time since the fire, "You do?" Julian asked warily. Logan now had the misfortune of having to answer and he didn't know what he was supposed to say to him. Did he want Julian to return?

When Logan didn't answer, Julian spoke again, this time with a rough tone, "Logan why are you here?"

Logan's face was filled with so many emotions that Julian couldn't distinguish one from the other, "To talk to you. To move on from the fire."

Julian looked annoyed now, "Then say something!" he burst out, "You know everything. Now it's your turn to say something."

Logan looked nauseous, "I don't know what to say…" he forced the words out, "I don't know how to move on from this…" he trailed away.

Julian's face changed into a blank slab of emotionless features, "Then you don't move on."

With that, he walked away into the cool night, leaving Logan staring after him like he wanted to call him back.

* * *

**_4_**

Julian never went back to Dalton and instead finished his education through home-schooling on the sets of his various movies. He threw himself into his work, just like every other time he wanted to forget about Logan. He kept in contact with Derek because, through it all, Derek had always been his best friend and he knew that he needed him. It was Derek who kept him sane most of the time.

Logan retreated into himself and never quite forgave himself for not taking the opportunity to move on that Julian had offered. He left Dalton with excellent grades and went on to Harvard to get his law degree. He heard from Derek once in a while but kept himself distant from things that reminded him of his past. It wasn't until he received an email from Derek that he was spurred into action. The email was his opening. Even though he assured himself that he had missed his chance and that it was too late to try and move on, he found himself arriving at LAX airport and driving straight to the Hollywood mansion where Julian's party was being held. It was a party celebrating Julian on his Oscar nomination.

He didn't know whose house it was but Derek had invited him so he made his way through the crowd of people intent on finding Julian. It wasn't until he had searched the house one and a half times that he realised that he knew exactly where Julian would be.

He made his way past the people milling about on the patio and pool area and stepped onto the lawn, looking around for the actor.

He spotted him at the bottom of the garden, sitting on the grass with a bottle of champagne next to him.

"Congratulations." Logan said as he made his way to where Julian was sitting with his back to the approaching Logan. Thinking for a moment that it was just another party guest and wanting to be left alone, he answered with a slight tone of annoyance, "Thanks," Julian turned his head to see who it was but stopped when he saw the familiar green eyes and blonde hair, "_Logan_?" he spluttered.

Logan sat down on the grass before answering quietly, "Hey Julian."

Julian stared at him for a minute before asking, "What the hell are you doing here?"

Logan gave a weak chuckle before saying, "Uh, I'm here to move on." Julian was too shocked to say anything other than, "What?"

"I know I'm like seven years too late but I really do want to move on and so that's what I'm here to do."

Julian was still at a loss for words, "You mean- I haven't- um, I think you've already had seven years to move on. I don't even remember high school or anything so…" Julian tried very hard to act like seeing Logan for the first time in seven years wasn't a big deal. In all honesty, it was much less of a big deal than if Logan had arrived three or four years after the fire. But in the seven years since the fire, he _had_ somehow managed to move on. Seven years was a long time and he hadn't thought he'd ever see Logan again so he had seen other guys, fallen in love with other girls and pushed all thoughts of Logan out of his mind. Of course he would always think of Logan as his first love but that part of his life was over.

"Don't lie, Julian, you haven't forgotten high school."

Julian frowned at him, "Actually-"

"I know seven years is a long time and that everything has changed since the fire," Logan cut Julian off and started to speak, "but I need to move on, because I've been regretting that night at Prom for years now and I can't stand it anymore." He paused for a breath but Julian didn't know what to say so he let Logan continue.

"I'm sorry for not noticing that you l-loved me," he stuttered over the word and realised that this was the first time he had ever said it out loud, "and I'm sorry for all the pain that I caused you. I'm sorry that you had to tell me during the fire, that you felt like you couldn't tell me before then. I'm sorry for being a dick to you and Derek and for never realising what an amazing friend you were and how much I cared about you. And I'm sorry that I let you leave after Prom and I'm sorry that you had to wait seven years for my apologies.

"I want us to be friends again, I want you in my life. I don't how you still feel about me… if you still care about me like that and to be honest, I don't know if I care about you in that way. But I know that I really missed you, Jules and I can't stay away any longer. So… yeah." He finished his speech and fell silent, giving Julian the time to process.

Julian took a long time but when he did finally gather himself, the first thing he did was pull Logan into a hug, "I missed you too, Lo. I don't know how I feel right now because it's kind of an overload of emotions and I never thought that I'd see you again so I guess I need some time but, thank you anyway for coming here and saying all that stuff. I'm so glad you're here."

Nothing happened immediately but slowly the two of them managed to become friends again, best friends even and, finally, they were able to move on.

* * *

**_+1  
_**

Julian looked around the living room a couple of times before asking a passing friend who was on her way to the bathroom, "Have you seen Logan?"

She said that she hadn't and he let her go while he checked all the rooms in the house. It had been Logan's idea to have the party so Julian might just have to kill Logan if he had decided to disappear and leave Julian to host the stupid thing.

Eventually he gave up and made his way outside to the garden, only to find someone already sitting in his preferred spot by the bird-bath.

"Never thought _I'd_ be the one to find _you_ outside the party. I thought that was my thing?" Julian said as he stood next to the bench and looked down at Logan.

Logan looked up and smiled, "Yeah, I guess your habits are rubbing off on me. I never used to run away from parties."

"Well you better get back in there, since it's _your_ party." Julian said teasingly.

"It's _our_ house-warming party. Or is it not _our _house?" Logan teased back.

"It was _your_ idea to have the party therefore it's _your_ party. Besides, you know I hate parties."

Logan grinned at his best friend, "Well then it's a good thing that you love me enough to host a party that you hate." He sent a wicked grin to Julian and grabbed his hand before pulling him down and onto his lap.

Julian gave a huff of feigned annoyance but didn't protest when Logan grabbed his face with his hands and pulled him in for a kiss.

When they separated Julian said playfully, "Hmm, _do_ I love you? Even after you forced me to have a party at our house and then abandoned me at it?"

Logan pulled Julian closer for another kiss, "Oh shut up, I know that you love me. Just as much as I love you, you diva princess."

* * *

A/N: There you go. I know it's normally five times x happens and one time y happens but I bent the rules (if there are even any rules about that kind of thing?) I'm really happy with the way this story turned out and I hope you are too. Leave any thoughts in a review and I'll one very happy person! -Cloey


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